"The secret of The Compassionate Friends is simple.There is no line between being a helper and being helped. In the early months of people's membership in TCF, it seems that most of the time is spent absorbing ideas, crying, letting the grief flow, and 'learning the ropes' of a bereaved parent. The next step is reaching out to others and helping them. It is not a big step, for listening to another person sort out his life helps us to sort out our life too. But it is an important step because it is the first point at which the movement is reversed. All the energy had been going inward. We had been feeling so empty inside that we kept withdrawing into ourselves. But at that point when we turn around is the point when we first listen to another, speak words of comfort and hope, share our pain instead of just feeling our pain."

- Dennis Klass, Ph. D., TCF Advisor, Saint Louis, Missouri

Coming to that first meeting is the hardest, but you have nothing to lose and a lot to gain. Feel free to bring a relative or other supportive person to your first meeting or two, until you feel comfortable with us. Try not to judge your first meeting as to whether TCF will work for you. That 2nd, 3rd or 4th meeting might be the time when you will find the right person or hear the right words that will help you with your grief work. Remember, we are all bereaved parents and family members who struggle with similar issues and the same intense pain.

The Compassionate Friends Credo

We need not walk alone. We are The Compassionate Friends. We reach out to each other with love, with understanding, and with hope. The children we mourn have died at all ages and from many different causes, but our love for them unites us. Your pain becomes my pain, just as your hope becomes my hope. We come together from all walks of life, from many different circumstances. We are a unique family because we represent many races, creeds, and relationships. We are young, and we are old. Some of us are far along in our grief, but others still feel a grief so fresh and so intensely painful that they feel helpless and see no hope. Some of us have found our faith to be a source of strength, while some of us are struggling to find answers. Some of us are angry, filled with guilt or in deep depression, while others radiate an inner peace. But whatever pain we bring to this gathering of The Compassionate Friends, it is pain we will share, just as we share with each other our love for the children who have died. We are all seeking and struggling to build a future for ourselves, but we are committed to building a future together.  We reach out to each other in love to share the pain as well as the joy, share the anger as well as the peace, share the faith as well as the doubts, and help each other to grieve as well as to grow. We Need Not Walk Alone. We Are The Compassionate Friends.

©2007 The Compassionate Friends

Contact Us

Call 925-871-2604
If you will leave your name and phone number, a Compassionate Friends member will return your call.

Email tcfccc@yahoo.com

Write us at:
P.O. Box 5523
Walnut Creek, CA 94596-1523

Regional Coordinator:
Nancy Juracka, (310) 722-5425

National TCF Organization


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